buyer's guilt

My work has become an inevitable avalanche--I can foresee my upcoming burial. A wiser artist would hole up in the studio to try to stem the tide, but not I. Instead, I go out to dinners, visits and most recently the opening of my group show at the Foster Gallery.

Want to know the truth? I went because I wanted to wear my new dress. I bought it during the summer in Montreal and haven't had an occasion to wear it since. Thanks to global warming, the weather was warm enough and the opportunity ripe. Ah, now I am relieved of my July buyer's guilt.

ego boost

I admit I'm easily influenced by other's opinions. My friend Jarrett once gave me the wise advice to never read reviews. "Good reviews just stroke your ego," he told me, "and bad reviews just make you feel bad. Neither makes the book better." Good point, and advice that I try to take to heart. However, I admit feeling a bit low when glancing through Kirkus' Best Books of 2006. Lots of great books, I thought, Aliens are Coming, Butterfly Eyes...but nothing by poor l'il old me.

Humbled, I settle down to read the MT Anderson interview, when lo and behold on the last page is a notice of MY book. Year of the Dog is listed as one of the best early chapter books of 2006!

I know it doesn't make the book better, but my ego sure likes it.

thanksgiving

Yes, instead of the traditional picture of the matriarch carrying a roasted turkey, this is a picture of me carrying a trayful of turkey cupcakes. I know you're not surprised. This year, I traveled to Chicago to my sister's for Thanksgiving. While she and her husband slaved over the turkey, sweet potato tarts, cranberry bread and pumpkin pies, I contributed the turkey cupcakes.


These were made with (or in spite of) the help of my niece Lily, whom despite other's proclamations is the cutest niece ever. And while this photo doesn't even show a quarter of her cuteness, I had to include it as it shows one of her own turkey cupcakes (can you guess which one?)



These cakes seemed fairly popular with the kids, who promptly ate the decorations, licked off the frosting and then asked for another. However, with 2 pumpkin pies, an apple pie, a pecan pie and champagne jello, there were a lot of turkey cupcakes leftover.



And these are a lot harder to make sandwiches out of.

autumn in the pacyforest

Red leaf
abandoned by friends
and burning
alone
on my branch
If I let you go
will you fly in the sky
or fall to the ground?
the ashes of dead leaves
at my feet
make me cling
to you
Tighter

showing off

This is a photo of my empty closet that was once full with over 30 framed pieces of my art. Where have they gone? Well, I'm having two shows...
The first one is:

Illustration Strange Turns of the Mind's Road
Group show with Jarrett Krosoczka, Ann P. Smith, Peter Reynolds, Paul Olson, Fred Lynch, Grace Lin, and Kelly Murphy.

November 27, 2006 - January 5th, 2007
Foster Gallery
10 Campus Drive Dedham, MA
02026
781.320.7227
Opening reception - November 30th, 2006


And the other one:

Grace Lin:The Path of a Children's Author/Illustrator
Owen Smith Shuman Gallery
Groton Public Library
99 Main St.
Groton, MA 01450
978-448-8000

November 18th- December 26, 2006
Artist talk--December 5, 7pm

Books and art will be sold at both events so a great time to get some holiday gifts (or free food). As for me, I think I might get to wear my new dress. That's hanging in the other closet.

whining

I'm always really shocked when I realize people actually read this blog. Whenever I write, I usually assume the only ones reading it are my handful of friends and a few on the periphery. To be honest, I'd rather keep this illusion as stage fright occurs when I think about how much I reveal about my life (though I am trying to be better about it compared to my first blog).

Many a things that I write I don't say to people in person, even friends I am most comfortable with, because I just can't imagine anyone wanting to hear me whine all the time. Which is why perhaps writing and blogging is such a seductive pastime, it allows me to whine silently, sans guilt.

But recently, on the Blue Rose Girl blog I posted an excerpt of an essay on racism, which garnered a comment faulting me of excessive negativity. "I just get tired of stories like this," the insightful Sally J. commented.

And I realized silent or not, my words are still bellyaches and groans foisted upon readers. And this, I regret. Perhaps you, dear reader, think I don't have a sense of humor or have an inflated idea of my own importance--both of which is not true (at least I hope not). However, if that has crossed your mind, I am truly sorry.

But there are only about eight people reading this thing anyway, right?

truly great review

My sister just sent me this link to a truly great review of The Year of the Dog. It completely made my day!

It's such a great review (almost nothing makes an author happier when they read someone who really "gets" their book) I'm considering sending it to the Cybils to use as a review of the day, but maybe that is too self-serving. I cringe at the possible tackiness of doing that, but my upcoming credit card bill is starting to make me shameless.

author photo

Since Lissy's Friends is about origami animals, I made the following author photo. I'm very pleased with it, the likeness is quite impeccable--at least in my opinion! I think I might use it for all my publicity from now on.

fall

A lot of things fall through the cracks in mia casa. I can't tell if it's because the cracks are so large or if it's because I am so careless, but the bits and pieces of my life seem to fall like the autumn leaves. And as we learn we were remiss about Robert's remission, I realize how impossible it is to catch all that falls during the descending season.

detours

This past weekend, I met up with a good friend of mine from college. Because of fate and inconvenience, this was the first time I had seen him since my wedding. And so much had changed! He's now the proud papa of two, with a dog, house and gold minivan.

Since meeting him, I've felt an odd sense of mourning. The time that has past, the roads that I've taken--all so different from the path I thought I was on 10 years ago. The what-if's of life seem to follow me like a funeral parade. What if Robert and I had stayed broken up that time? What if we had brought him to the doctor sooner? What if he had never had cancer?

And the answer to all of that is simple. Everything would've been different.

And I find myself grieving for the life that I'll never have. The life that seemed an apple pluck away but was really just an illusion. I realize that it was just like a fluffy white cloud in the sky--when you fall, you think it will cushion you but instead it disappears as you go right through.

But perhaps it is all for the best, as my feet and head are now watching the ground instead of the sky and I am walking one step at a time. I'll just be grateful I don't need a gold minivan for that.

on the bluebonnet masterlist

Hey, The Year of the Dog is on the Texas Bluebonnet Award 2007-2008 Master List. cool beans!

grace goes to washington

I was in Washington DC this weekend for the Multicultural Children's Book Fair at the Kennedy Center. It was great fun, met neat people and all...but I have to say the highlight of my stay was the hotel room. Last year I traveled so much that I would forget what number room I was staying in. But this room will be remembered. Why? Let me take you on the tour:


First I enter and see a lovely vanity area and bathroom to my left. I forgot to take a picture of the actual bathroom but suffice to say that it is about 2 times bigger than the one I have a home.

Then the nice cushy bed, with the softest throw you can image (like a cloud). There's a sitting area and also an office table with free dsl and refreshments (including chocolate coveredbiscuiti). It's a little bit of a mess because I've already help myself and started to spread.


But the best part is when you turn the corner--there's a kitchen! I've never had a hotel room with a kitchen before. The refrigerator is full size and there's a bottle of sparkling apple cider waiting for me. Gosh, I could make myself at home...and never go back to my real home. Think Robert would notice?

lissy doll version 1

Here's the first prototype of the Lissy Doll. We're going to work on the face to make it more accurate as well as the skin tone and jacket... but VERY EXCITING!!! I especially like how they got her red sneakers right.

cover story

Last May, my friend Justina Chen Headley told me the back story of her cover art for Nothing But the Truth and a few White Lies. The book is about a “hapa”, a half white and half Asian girl, and the publisher was having problems finding an image of a girl that looked hapa-enough for Justina’s taste. Finally, they offered to let her find her own model and help art direct the cover. She found the perfect girl at a coffee shop, set up a photo shoot and voila! One of the most lovely covers I’ve seen.

And I have to admit I was a little envious. The cover of my book was my idea, but suddenly choosing a model and having a photo shoot just seemed so much more glamorous. And fun! I could have a call for entries, maybe a contest…my mind raced with the possibilities.

“Gee,” I said to my editor (who is also Justina’s editor), “I wish I could’ve chosen a model and done a cover like Justina’s.”
“I don’t think that would’ve worked,” she said, “How many girls would want to be on a cover of a book called, “The Year of the Dog?”
“Yeah, you’re right,” I said, “Maybe the next book.”
“But,” she said, “Your next book is called, The Year of the Rat!”

Ah, good point. Sigh.

years go by

Today, as I was drawing I found myself staring at my hands. As I looked at them, slightly chapped, with slight scars and wrinkles, I suddenly realized--these are my mother's hands. Through some alchemy of time, my hands and I have become practical and aged.

And these changes fill me with bittersweet thoughts. I remember once, in my youth, thinking that I wanted to be just like my Mom. She could play the piano, wear lipstick, and buy candy any time she wanted to (though she never did). Adults could do that. I thought they were so lucky.

But surprisingly, adulthood has not been full of the simple pleasures I imagined. I’ve buckled under its pressures and it’s left wrinkles that can never be smoothed. And as I observe the invisible transformation of carefree to careworn, I can’t help but wonder-- when did this happen?

And I realize that this has happened when I wasn't looking, as most important things go. It's the moments I miss, the minutes and seconds I cancel or forget that all add up and become what changes me irreversibly.

Unless you believe those Oil of Olay ads.

yum

But I think this would have been better as cupcakes.

fun things in my inbox

Nothing helps me procrastinate more than e-mailing and blogging. So you know when I blog about e-mails it is procrastination at its paramount.

First I received, this is a photo from a mother whose daughter used Year of the Dog as her school project. For those who know the book, this is the scene where my mother falls asleep standing up during a school assembly and wakes up to a glaring teacher. You can't tell from the photo, but the teacher is holding a sign that says "disobedient children" with my mother's name right underneath. Too cute! It's kind of a thrill to think that students are making dioramas of my book, just like the way I used to from books by the likes of Beverly Cleary.


I also received this from the publisher of the Seven Chinese Sisters. The Worldwide Adoption Services has asked if I would grant permission to create these wooden nesting dolls for their charity. I said yes and hope they are quite successful, though I do find it curious that my work seems to make a lot more money for charity then it does for me. But who am I to complain? And these dolls are really sweet.

memory

This past weekend was my 10 year college reunion. I didn’t go because Robert has an allergic reaction to reunions. Last time we went to a reunion was about 5 years ago for my high school reunion. Robert broke out into hives he was so bored. And, he said, the hives were more interesting than the reunion.

I, however, had a pretty good time. My most unforgettable memory was meeting up with an old acquaintance that used to do all the lighting and tech stuff for the drama club.

“I’m a children’s book author/illustrator, now,” I told him, “What do you do?”
“Oh, I do lighting for shows and movies, that kind of thing,” he said.
“That’s great,” I said, “I can completely see you doing that. What shows have you done?”
“Oh, just some shows,” he said, “You probably haven’t seen any of them.”
“I might have,” I said, “Just name them.”
“Umm,” he said, “Well, I kind of don’t want to tell you.”
“Why?” I said, “Is it porn or something?”
“Well,” he said, “Yes.”
“Oh.”

That conversation pretty much ended in awkward silence. Though, my laughter about it on the car ride home could be heard for miles.

bid!

My February Lanterns painting is NOW on auction. Please BID.

cupcake dreams

I am definitely riding a wave of happiness these days. Even receiving my discouraging royalty statement (which usually sends me into the depths of despair) seems like a just a slight dip into the water. Nowadays, I have been floating on my back, looking at the clouds.

My most recent castle in the sky has been the idea of leaving children's books and opening up a cupcake bakery. No, really--I have it all planned out. My friend Loretta, who is a real chef, would be the culinary expertise, Robert would design the small but quaint store (in the middle of Harvard Square), Ki-Ki and I would do all the logos and murals on the walls and I'd get all the girls to be partners. We'd call it "The Cupcake Garden" and students and tourists would line up along the streets just for our cupcakes. It'd be great, I know it. What do you think?

Ah, I've sold more cupcakes in my dreams than I have books in real life. The dreams are just so much sweeter.